Friday, January 22, 2010

When strangers call me Champ, Chief, Bud, Captain, Big Guy, Guy, Pal, Sport,

Tiger, Skippy, Scooter, Ace, Hoss, Boss, Kiddo, Junior, Partner, Sparky or Slick.

I guess if Clint Eastwood called me Big Guy, it would be fine. But even then, I'd probably walk away saying to myself, "Wow, Clint Eastwood is kind of a dick."

These are all perfectly acceptable:
Senator, Corporal, Cowboy, Comrade, Sergeant Coolpants, Amigo, Ghost Rider, Puppydog, Slippery Pete, Tendorfoot, Monsignor, Charlemagne, Black Man, Brodisahtvah, Mr. Brojangles, Brohammed, Captain Thunderpants and General Chim Chim.

29 comments:

  1. What about Slim? Can I call ya Slim?

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    1. I just spoke to my lawyer. We can greenlight "Slim" no problem.

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    2. I just spoke to my lawyer, and it hasn't exceeded statute of limitations;Further, allowing me to say, this is hella funny.

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  2. After the terrible movie with Nicholas Cage, I would rethink Ghost Rider... Ghost Writer would be awesome. Gotta love old PBS shows. Plus those pen necklaces were pretty cool...

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    1. I have not seen that, but I think it would make me want to do a swan dive into a tank of turpentine.

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  3. Replies
    1. Are you a vampire. You have a vampire name. Respect.

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  4. The ironic thing is when the obvious "cocky" dude says to me "hey there chief" and I return with "what's up captain (or boss)", they look at me like "I" have an attitude problem. I've even had a guy respond with "what's your problem, man". I just said "I don't have a problem, and I'm not your chief". LOL.

    Try returning the salutation and see what happens. It's all about their puffed up ego and pride with an attempt at intimidation.

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  5. I was just thinking about a huge pet peeve I have concerning the most dreaded salutations I DO NOT appreciate being addressed by...

    The Top 15:
    1: Chief
    2: Boss
    3: Sport
    4: Champ
    5: Captain
    6: Big Guy
    7: Tough Guy
    8: Junior
    9: Slick
    10: Hoss
    11: Ranger
    12: Slugger
    13: Scout
    14: Cowboy
    15: Buck-a-roo

    In very rare situations would any of these be acceptable, it depends on who they are coming from.

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    1. I very much agree with this list, Danny Boy. The source certainly matters. Buck-a-roo would feel awful nice coming from Sam Elliot. Chief has to be in the pole position. I think your top 10 is rock solid. Those aren't cool coming from anyone.

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  6. I don't want anybody calling me "son" or "kid" or "sport" or nothing like that, cool?
    Cool, whatever you say, slick.

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  7. I don't understand why so many people have referred to me as "Handsome" in a similar vein. I'm certainly NOT handsome, and they don't appear to be intelligent enough to be applying sarcasm. I think they're using it like "Chief." Henceforth, I'll reply, "Yes? General Tso?"

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  8. Love this list but need to add “pal” and “fella.”

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  9. The Great Gatsby called everyone Old Sport. But I agree, coming from anyone else I don't really appreciate it.

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  10. Fella. Omg. Love that one. Off the list I am stealing slugger. My new fav

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  11. people, especially the women, are always calling me pet names like "Stud" or "Mister Big" or "Porn Star" or things like that. Usually doesn't bother me. But I hate "Bud" or "Guy" or "Fella" from other men.

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  12. My fiancee and I always call each other these names because we think it's hilarious as a joke, but hearing these from anyone else would be terrible.

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  13. You come up with these names all on your own hotshot?

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  14. How about the girls?
    Darling
    Honey
    Sister
    ...

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