WAVING YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR LIKE YOU JUST DON’T CARE

Why don’t you care? That’s messed up. Do you have any idea how much shit is going on in the world right now? Let’s start with ISIS. Those Arabian ninjas will chop your head off just for eating chicken wings at Hooters. Also, is it ISIS or ISIL? Aren’t you even a little bit concerned that we can’t align on a name, Mr. Wavy Hands? The Cobra Commander has his taser on kill mode and you’re just heyin’ and hoin’ like a wet t-shirt contestant in Daytona Beach. You’re probably on ecstasy right now, aren’t you? And don’t get me started on climate change. Too late, you already did, Jo Jo Dancer. Did you know that since 1996, Bark Beetles have decimated an area roughly the size of Washington State because it hasn’t been cold enough to kill them off? Oh and California is on fire, but since it’s not a roof you don’t give a shit. While you and Lindsey Graham are busy doing The Watusi planet earth is going to hell in a handbasket. And what about Meg Ryan? She used to be America’s sweetheart, but now she looks like Michael Jackson. What’s going on with her psychologically? Aren’t you worried about that or is it all about getting turnt with you? This is some serious crapola and you are not a Laker Girl. Get your priorities straight for crying out loud.