Friday, February 26, 2010

Hippies With Clipboards

Do I care about children in the Congo? Yes. Do I want to stop and talk to you? No. Do I like the smell of patchouli and poo? Not a huge fan. Does that dog look like he hasn’t had his shots? Absolutely. Is his name Kenya? Probably. Would I punch you in the balls if I didn’t think Kenya would attack me? Without a doubt. Do your parents know where you are? Nope. Is your mom worried sick? Heck yeah. Do they regret paying all that money to send you to a small liberal arts college in Maine? You betcha. Is your dad still disappointed you quit the lacrosse team? Dang right. Do white people look good with dreads? Kinda. Are you going to end up starving to death while living with mountain goats in Alaska? Highly likely. Do I like it when people ask and answer their own questions? Shit no. Is that fodder for a future peeve? I don’t see why not.

6 comments:

  1. yeah. decorative balls are pretty bad too, but at least they don't talk to you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. no the worst is the jacked up doped out hippies, missing teeth, ink on their face, that tell you, "c'mon man I gotta make my quota" wtf! am I supporting your habits or the aids ridden walking dead of gumare?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Just found your blog today. Bummed you haven't posted more :( This shit is awesome. Come back?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Is this my first time reading this blog? Yes. Am I enthralled? Hellz bellz yes.

    ReplyDelete
  5. OMG awesome with thumbs! lmost a year is a long enough hiatus. Come back or we stab you

    ReplyDelete
  6. I like it when they want me to help them save deadly/nasty things like sharks, giant ants, and snakes. "Did you know that vipers are an important part of our ecosystem?" "Huh. Did you know that I'm going this way now?"

    ReplyDelete