Hipster Smediums

When did they decide to make large t-shirts fit like wet suits? Nothing’s ever right with these things. That innocent PBR pooch ceases to be your little secret and the sleeves generate an instant, horrifying pit swamp. You have to basically stop wearing nipple rings. Not only that, the designs are always huge and stupid and ironically off-center. The whole scenario is starting to cramp my strict policy of not working out. So, in the spirit of brotherhood, I’ve created this conversion chart. S = Toy Dogs. M = Newborns. L = Kindergartners. XL = Crackheads. XXL = Normal folks. XXXL = Slightly chubby. XXXXL = Small football players.