Tiger, Skippy, Scooter, Ace, Hoss, Boss, Kiddo, Junior, Partner, Sparky or Slick.
I guess if Clint Eastwood called me Big Guy, it would be fine. But even then, I'd probably walk away saying to myself, "Wow, Clint Eastwood is kind of a dick."
These are all perfectly acceptable:
Senator, Corporal, Cowboy, Comrade, Sergeant Coolpants, Amigo, Ghost Rider, Puppydog, Slippery Pete, Tendorfoot, Monsignor, Charlemagne, Black Man, Brodisahtvah, Mr. Brojangles, Brohammed, Captain Thunderpants and General Chim Chim.
What about Slim? Can I call ya Slim?
ReplyDeleteI just spoke to my lawyer. We can greenlight "Slim" no problem.
DeleteI just spoke to my lawyer, and it hasn't exceeded statute of limitations;Further, allowing me to say, this is hella funny.
DeleteAfter the terrible movie with Nicholas Cage, I would rethink Ghost Rider... Ghost Writer would be awesome. Gotta love old PBS shows. Plus those pen necklaces were pretty cool...
ReplyDeleteI have not seen that, but I think it would make me want to do a swan dive into a tank of turpentine.
DeleteBest blog post ever.
ReplyDeleteAre you a vampire. You have a vampire name. Respect.
DeleteThe ironic thing is when the obvious "cocky" dude says to me "hey there chief" and I return with "what's up captain (or boss)", they look at me like "I" have an attitude problem. I've even had a guy respond with "what's your problem, man". I just said "I don't have a problem, and I'm not your chief". LOL.
ReplyDeleteTry returning the salutation and see what happens. It's all about their puffed up ego and pride with an attempt at intimidation.
Knock it off with the LOL's, chief.
DeleteI was just thinking about a huge pet peeve I have concerning the most dreaded salutations I DO NOT appreciate being addressed by...
ReplyDeleteThe Top 15:
1: Chief
2: Boss
3: Sport
4: Champ
5: Captain
6: Big Guy
7: Tough Guy
8: Junior
9: Slick
10: Hoss
11: Ranger
12: Slugger
13: Scout
14: Cowboy
15: Buck-a-roo
In very rare situations would any of these be acceptable, it depends on who they are coming from.
I very much agree with this list, Danny Boy. The source certainly matters. Buck-a-roo would feel awful nice coming from Sam Elliot. Chief has to be in the pole position. I think your top 10 is rock solid. Those aren't cool coming from anyone.
DeleteWhatever you say, slick.
ReplyDeleteThanks, silkypants.
DeleteGood luck with that SQUIRT
ReplyDeleteThanks for the support, mellow yellow.
DeleteWhat about "Sunshine"
ReplyDeleteWhat about "Sunshine"
ReplyDeleteAlot of names there, Ranger.
ReplyDeleteI don't want anybody calling me "son" or "kid" or "sport" or nothing like that, cool?
ReplyDeleteCool, whatever you say, slick.
You have all forgotten...Sparky
ReplyDeleteI don't understand why so many people have referred to me as "Handsome" in a similar vein. I'm certainly NOT handsome, and they don't appear to be intelligent enough to be applying sarcasm. I think they're using it like "Chief." Henceforth, I'll reply, "Yes? General Tso?"
ReplyDeleteLove this list but need to add “pal” and “fella.”
ReplyDeleteThe Great Gatsby called everyone Old Sport. But I agree, coming from anyone else I don't really appreciate it.
ReplyDeleteFella. Omg. Love that one. Off the list I am stealing slugger. My new fav
ReplyDeletepeople, especially the women, are always calling me pet names like "Stud" or "Mister Big" or "Porn Star" or things like that. Usually doesn't bother me. But I hate "Bud" or "Guy" or "Fella" from other men.
ReplyDeleteMy fiancee and I always call each other these names because we think it's hilarious as a joke, but hearing these from anyone else would be terrible.
ReplyDeletesimp
DeleteYou come up with these names all on your own hotshot?
ReplyDeleteHow about the girls?
ReplyDeleteDarling
Honey
Sister
...