Love
is a many splendored feeling, but not on facebook. When someone writes mushy
junk on their significant other’s wall it makes me want to take off all my
clothes and jump into a hot pit of lava. When you do this, you’re not really
telling your honey boo boo that she’s the world’s biggest snugglebum, you’re
telling the world that you’re the world’s biggest dingleberry. Let’s keep the
pillow talk for places with pillows. And maybe the occasional “you smell like a
wet puppy” as you hold the door for them. They love that shit.
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